Fleeting

I took Andrew to his short summer Mother's Day Out/Preschool program this week. We'd been home together, just him and me and Caroline, for four weeks.

I thought I'd be knocking down their door to drop him off, but I wasn't. I was so sad. I teared up walking back to my car and that is so not like me.

These days at home are so fleeting. I want to hold on to them.



And while every mom deserves a few alone hours a week to run errands or get some work done or take a nap, it's still hard to say goodbye.

I put him to bed tonight and though he usually just asks for more pats, tonight he wanted to rock.

It's been ages since we sat down to rock in his left-over from the nursery days glider, but we snuggled in and rocked. And then he said hold my hand mama.

And my mama heart cried.



Remember when he was so little and I spent hours nursing him in that chair, singing about nap time.

Remember when he decided he didn't want to sit in my lap, but right next to me while we read books.



Remember when we'd just moved him to his big boy bed and he couldn't even climb up to tuck himself in without a boost from me.

He is so much fun and such a joy. I just want remember it all, take it all in, enjoy it and be there.